Bid My Soul Farewell by Beth Revis

Author:Beth Revis
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Penguin Young Readers Group
Published: 2019-09-23T16:00:00+00:00

THIRTY

Nedra

I NEVER WANTED power, except to save my sister. But the only time I felt power that seemed strong enough was when I neared the black in my crucible, the echoes of Bennum Wellebourne’s own corrupt necromancy. Feeding the light of souls to the dark power made me feel drunk on my own strength.

But what if, I thought, the only way to save my sister is to sacrifice the lives and souls of others? I raised my eyes to meet Grey’s. What if saving her means taking him? I dropped my gaze.

What if, to save her, I have to give up myself, too?

That blackness in my crucible was starving. It would have consumed Grey’s soul . . . but it had wanted mine.

Books. I had to read more. Every line, every word. There had to be something. I would read every day until we got to Miraband, and then . . . I swallowed down the hopelessness welling inside me. I will find the answers I need, I swore to myself.

Beams of sunlight poured through the porthole window as the day grew long, dust motes like stars hanging in the air. We read in silence until they faded, the light so dim we could no longer see the printed text. I stretched, the skin on my residual arm pulling almost painfully, my shoulder popping. The events of this morning felt far away. The entire world felt far away.

“This is like being back at Yūgen,” I said. “Studying all the time. Remember?”

Grey’s eyes warmed, matching my smile. “I remember wanting to do more than study,” he said.

“I wish I had another book to throw at you.”

“There’s a whole pile of them over there,” he said, pointing.

“They’re too precious to risk damaging on your thick skull.”

Grey laughed. He let the book he’d been reading drop to the floor, although he was careful to make sure the spine wasn’t damaged. “It feels like forever ago,” he said. “It’s amazing how important I thought all that was.”

“All that?”

“Taking the robes, graduating top of the class, getting a high appointment at the Governor’s Hospital. Even the people. Trying to impress Master Ostrum.” He cut his eyes at me. “Tomus.”

I rolled my eyes. I had never understood why Grey liked the childish brute.

“I cared so much about what he thought,” Grey mused. “But once I left school, in merely a few days, he just became someone I used to know. There are people in our lives who fill up our whole attention, but they’re still only temporary. And there are others who settle into our hearts and minds comfortably and never leave.”

Despite the events of this morning, I couldn’t help but smile at Grey’s words.

“Oh, did you think I meant you?” Grey asked smarmily. “I was absolutely talking about this dog I had when I was a kid, she was a great dog—”

I kissed him to shut him up, tasting his laugh on my tongue.

And then he kissed me back, and there wasn’t laughter there anymore.

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